For a long time, John Loerop just wanted revenge.
After he had heard the screams, after he had tried to revive his daughter with CPR, after he had attended her funeral, he wanted the boy who had hit her with his car to pay.
But eventually, John Loerop's heart changed.
DeAndre Wolfe, then 16, was driving home after picking up a Mother's Day present in 2011 when his car struck 4-year-old Annabella Loerop, who had gone into the street in her Tinley Park neighborhood to recover a wayward basketball.
Wolfe, a student at Tinley Park High School, had traces of marijuana in his system, and about three months after the accident he was charged with reckless homicide as well as driving under the influence.
If convicted, he was facing prison time. But after numerous court hearings and anguished conversations, John Loerop and his wife decided that wasn't what they wanted.
A nurse at Stateville Correctional Center, Loerop has seen young men go into prison and become even harder behind bars.
While they struggled with their loss, Loerop and his wife decided they didn't want to see another young life thrown away. So they gave the teen a chance at life their daughter would never have.
At the Loerops' urging, prosecutors offered a plea deal to Wolfe — they would drop the reckless homicide charges and Wolfe would plead guilty instead to aggravated DUI, receiving probation and 480 hours of community service.
Wolfe wouldn't go to prison.
"My husband felt strongly, and I completely agreed, that prison would completely ruin (Wolfe), and that wouldn't honor our daughter's life either," said Tanya Loerop.
"We decided that the loss of one life does not equate the necessity to completely and totally waste another life."
Wolfe, who grew up in Oak Forest, graduated last summer from high school, where he played football and baseball and ran track. He works at a gas station and a concert hall's warehouse and plans to study audio engineering in Arizona later this year.
He has denied speeding or being high when he hit Annabella on May 9, 2011. Judge John Hynes noted that Wolfe had no prior criminal or delinquent record, and the teen cooperated with police at the scene on the 5500 block of 175th Street.
His attorney, Shay Allen, said Wolfe was convicted because of the state's "antiquated" and "Draconian" strict liability law. Prosecutors do not have to prove that a driver was under the influence at the time of an accident if they have any amount of an illegal substance in their system, Allen said.
John Loerop wasn't looking for punishment until he learned that Wolfe had marijuana in his system and he was charged in court.
"It was wanting him to go to jail, wanting him to suffer, wanting to ruin his life," Loerop said.
But over time, as Wolfe's hearings passed, the Loerops said they believed Wolfe wasn't high at the time of the accident. When prosecutors met with the Loerops in April and asked what they wanted, they suggested probation. They wanted punishment, but not something that would ruin Wolfe's life.
At the June 13 sentencing in Bridgeview, Assistant State's Attorney Denise Tomasek asked Hynes to sentence Wolfe to probation and community service because of "the wishes of the victim's family" and the teenager's age.
Wolfe cried as he explained to the court that the child's death has haunted him, calling it "the day I am never going to forget."
"It's never not in my mind," Wolfe said. "The memory of seeing the little girl laying on the ground and seeing the father run out."
Hynes called it "a tragic case." He also noted that Wolfe has otherwise "led a law-abiding life."
In addition to probation and community service, Hynes ordered Wolfe to participate in a drug and alcohol treatment program.
Annabella, who went by Bella, was the Loerops' oldest child, born after two years of infertility treatment. They had given up hope when Bella was conceived; they called her their "miracle child." They also have a son, Joey, and another child on the way.
The couple remember their daughter as an intelligent, beautiful girl who would come home from preschool dispensing random facts, such as "a flamingo eats algae."
The day she was killed, Bella had come home from school excited about a new book. The little girl helped her grandmother in the garden while her dad mowed the lawn, her father recalled.
According to Bella's father, the girl ran toward the street to grab a basketball while her grandfather and brother stayed in the yard. Bella looked both ways and it was clear. She threw the ball back and saw a car coming, so she stopped and waited. When that car passed, she ran, and that's when she was hit by Wolfe's Buick.
In statements presented at Wolfe's sentencing, Bella's parents lamented that they will never teach their daughter to ride a bike or watch her walk down the aisle on her wedding day.
The Loerops' forgiveness has not eliminated their grief.
"It doesn't mean we're not angry or devastated by the loss," John Loerop said. "But we have completely forgiven him."
Behavioral experts say forgiveness in extreme situations such as this is considered a healthy step.
"Forgiveness in these kinds of cases is heroic," said Robert Enright, a professor at the University of Wisconsin in Madison who has studied forgiveness for nearly three decades. "The kind of forgiveness that has to be given under these kinds of situations is very strong because the pain is so strong."
Showing mercy on another person can be good for the giver as well as the receiver, Enright said.
"You do it for the other person and you reap the emotional awards," he said.
Allen, Wolfe's attorney, said his client understands the opportunity he's been given.
"It's part of his life that hopefully will make him stronger and make him a better person," Allen said, calling the family's decision admirable.
"They were able to look past the tragedy and understand that it wouldn't do anyone any good for DeAndre to go to prison."
The Loerops hope Wolfe will go on to live a healthy, productive life.
"I want DeAndre to use this experience to help himself and to help others," John Loerop said. "I don't want two lives wasted."
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